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"The Rock Concert"

Promo

Promo Data
The Rock: "Finally The Rock has come back to Cleveland! Now I want you to keep it going. Keep it going, because The Rock is proud to be come out before we start The Rock Concert and tell you that tonight you have broken a record. Tonight is the largest sell out crowd in the history of the WWE right here in Cleveland! Tonight! Thank you! For that record I appreciate you chanting Rocky, but you should Cleveland.

Speaking of sell outs, anybody seen my body Marky Mark, I mean, John Cena, who came out here tonight? I mean, he came out here and he had a chain and a lock and his head was back... what does that even mean? I mean, that was funny. That was funny because that guy who came out that wasn't John Cena. No, no. The John Cena we all know is a guy that for the last eight years has been running around here looking like what would happen if Vanilla Ice banged a Teletubby. I guess he wanted some of that tele-tang. I don't know. But I got a picture for you. Here, let's bring this up. [auf dem TitanTron wird die Gleichung "Vanilla Ice + Teletubby = John Cena" jetzt bildlich dargestellt] Hey, you see, let me explain this. You see, the thing on the left got freaky with the thing in the middle and then... poooop... out popped John Cena.

But you know, Cleveland, listen, this ain't about some two minute rap. No no no no no. What this is, tonight, is about something special. [er greift zur Gitarre] Tonight ain't about some two minute rap, because everybody knows that Cleveland rocks! This is gonna be good. [er beginnt zu spielen und zu singen]

Warden threw a party and he spent some bucks. Didn't invite Cena 'cause he totally sucks. Cena started rapping, it all went south. Know your role, Jabroni, and shut your mouth! Let's rock. Everybody let's rock. Cena's got a menstrual clock, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks! Oh, it's going on, here we go!

Little Fruity Pebble from Newberry, Mass. Rock'll take his boot and shove it up his ass. Betcha you're all happy you're listening to me, and not some goofy Eminem wannabe. Let's rock. Everybody let's rock. Ain't no balls down in Cena's jock, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks! Thank you! Alright.

You all wanna here a true story? See, The Rock's got the inside scoop from John Cena's doctor. He visited a doctor last week. Kind of goes like this: Little Johnny Cena went to the doc. Rock punched his jaw and the pain wouldn't stop. Doc said Cena, you know I'm a fan, but please stop begging for that rectal exam. Let's rock. Everybody let's rock. Cena close up that smock, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks! Alright, alright, alright.

I got to ask you: Do you want to hear a little gossip? Rock's got some gossip. It's a true story about Cena and Eve. It's true. This is what happened. It's what you didn't see on RAW. But The Rock saw it. Rock saw Cena making out with Eve. Grabbing on her thigh, tugging on her weave. Cena was havin' the time of his life. I guess he didn't tell her that he's got a wife. Let's rock. Everybody let's rock. Divorce lawyer's right up the block, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks! Yeah, I guess it slipped his mind while he was slipping her the tongue.

I got a little diddy about the day John Cena was born. True story. These were all true stories. April 23rd, 1977. Doctor shouted "send that baby back to heaven". Sorry Mama Cena, but check these charts. Little baby Johnny's got lady parts. Let's rock. Everybody let's rock. Little Johnny's got them lady parts, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks. Thank you. I told you we're gonna have fun tonight.

You know, just out of curiousity, are there any grown men here tonight... I mean, grown men. Real men. Hold on, hold on, hold on. No, no, no, no. I know there's grown men here. No, no, no, no. But are there any grown men who are John Cena fans? Wow, no one? Oh wait, we got one! Okay, I see one. He's clapping. Rise above the hate. I'm sure there's a couple. There's one over there. Oh, there another one, okay. Listen, I'm not gonna mess with you. It's hard enough being you, so I'm not gonna mess with you. Actually, let The Rock ask the people. Should I mess with these guys? [breite Zustimmung] Okay, well, this song is especially for you and you and all the grown men who are John Cena fans out there. And it goes like this: Doesn't really matter how hard you try, never in your life will you ever taste pie. I know you love Chewbacca and Frodo, too, but you're a walking virgin and you're 42. Let's rock. Everybody let's rock. You dress like Kirk and Spock, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks!

Where are the ladies in the house tonight? See, you know The Rock and the ladies, we have a very special connection. I love women! I love the ladies. I love the ladies, but there's a very special lady that I do wanna sing a very special song to. She's at home right now and she's watching. Very, very, very special woman. And this special song is for you, baby. The Rock will see you tonight. Rock's getting some wine and a dozen roses. She's going to meet my Holy Moses. Getting with The Rock is the bomb. You don't believe me, ask Cena's mom. Let's rock. Everybody let's rock. Cena's mom can barely walk, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks!" I said one more time! Cena's mom can barely walk, but we're dancing 'cause Cleveland rocks!"

That's what I'm talking about. But there's only one way to end this night. There is only one way to end The Rock Concert. There is only one song. And this song, this song is for the people. This song is for Team Bring It. This song is for the people. This song is for the millions [and millions] of the Rock's fans who stand side by side support the Jabroni beating, pie eating, trail blazing, eyebrow raising, The Rock came back to scratch a major itch, gonna make Cena his kung pow bitch! Cleveland, Cleveland, we broke a record tonight. This is how we end it. This, Team Bring It, is your anthem. But The Rock ain't singing alone. No, no, no, no, no! Eighteen thousand strong. We're all singing this song. We're all singing this song! And it goes like this...

Making big noise saying with your best missing balls and every single day. So get the look of your face, being disgrace. Kicking your ass all over the place.

We will we will rock you! - Cena sucks!
We will we will rock you! - Cena sucks!

Cena you're a joke with your three moves saying that you're gonna beat The Rock there ain't no way, you rise above the hate, better off way, kicking your ass that is your face (sing it).

We will we will rock you! - Cena sucks!
We will we will rock you! - Cena sucks!

Cena you're a bitch eating kung pow chicken, you will never be the Rock on your very best day, dumb the look of the face, waste of space, Team Bring It Worldwide taking over this place.

We will we will rock you! - Cena sucks!
We will we will rock you! - Cena sucks!


Cleveland we broke the record! Thank you, Team Bring It Worldwide! We are going to WrestleMania, kicking John Cena's ass in the biggest match of all time! If you smell what The Rock is cooking!"
- Die kursiven Sätze wurden von The Rock gesungen, der Rest gesprochen.
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Average rating: 8.17  [35]
Average rating in 2024: 8.00  [1]
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