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"You fucking mark, fire me!"


Promo Data
"You fucking mark, fire me!"
[MJF tries to speak, but he is getting interrupted by the crowd.]

MJF: "I am in a lot of pain right now, after what happened last Sunday... but all you people wanna do is hear me talk, right? That's what... That's what you want, right? You wanna hear me talk? I'll talk...

[MJF takes a scarf off his shoulders and looks straight into the camera.]

...but this is Max Friedman talking! Big merger boss, lot of important executives here tonight to watch your product. Would be a real shame, if something bad happened... I wouldn't wanna embarrass you, man. Speaking of embarrassing, you've been tryna sit down with me to hash things out for quite some time now, haven't ya?

[The crowd starts chanting: "Shut the fuck up!".]

Well guess what? Too little too late. Here's why: when this company first started, it was All Friends Wrestling. Everybody was handed a ticket except for me! See, I had to write my own and boy do I have good penmanship, because I created moment after moment, after moment for this company... and I still get no respect! Nobody is on my level, no one! Everything I touch, turns to gold. There is nothing I can't do. Everytime I come out here, I am not expected to hit home runs, I'm expected to hit grand slams and I do that shit on a weekly basis! See, all the other boys, they get to settle for being great. I have to be perfect, because I'm the 26 years old, who is constantly held under a microscope, because I'm the only guy who is capable of carrying this company on my back as I had for months. It's funny... It's funny I hear boos, but I also hear clapping. That's interesting, that's interesting.

[The crowd is cheering for MJF.]

Where were you guys... Where were you guys this whole weekend, when you were calling me an unprofessional piece of shit? I'm just curious. You're not the only problem, no, it's the boys in the back too, cause the boys in the back all want my spot. Well guess what, you want my spot, you can have it, cause I don't wanna be here anymore. Now let's talk about you "fans", huh? You people call yourself fans, you're not fans. You're uneducated marks. You sit there, on your phones, tweeting out your opinions like they're worth a damn - let me explain something to you, people. You don't know shit! Your opinions suck! Your opinions change at the drop of a dime and then you pretend your new opinions are the same as your old, for example: "Man, I always knew MJF was a good wrestler". Really? That's interesting, because last time I checked, you guys pretended I sucked in the ring for a long time and why is that, huh? Because... Because I'm not ontrained like all your faves? Because I don't pretend to watch New Japan? Cause I don't dump... Cause I don't dump my opponents on their head? Cause I'm not reckless, what is it? Is it cause I'm not chasing star ratings, guys? What is it? How could I possibly be the best? Well, newsflash - I AM THE BEST! I'M THE BEST IN THE WORLD, CAUSE I'M THE ONLY GUY, WHO MAKES YOU FEEL... and unlike all those boys I don't gotta do a bunch of bullshit to get you there!

[The crowd is cheering yet again.]

I am a generational talent and you people consistently take me for granted, but it's not just you... It's the big man in the back too. Here's something you guys can't take for granted. Here's something he doesn't want you to know. Do you guys know, who the second biggest minute-for-minute draw is in this entire company? Nope! You wish... IT'S ME! It's me! And if you don't believe me, do me a favour - ask Stat Boy Tony in the back and see, what he's got to say... But whatever you do, don't ask him to reach into his pockets and pay the man, who's been busting his ass for him since day one! No, no, no, no, no, no! Make sure he hoards all that money... Make sure he hoards all that money, so he can give it to all the new ex-WWE guys he keeps bringing in.

[The crowd is shocked by MJF's words, but Max lifts his finger up so he can continue.]


[Cheers for MJF continue to grow.]

Hey... Hey, boss! Would you treat me better if I was an ex-WWE guy? See, maybe you don't get it, man. Here's the problem with you, boss. You got a position of power in the wrestling company, when the only position you should be assuming is behind the guardrail, with all of them! I don't wanna wait till 2024, but you don't listen to me, so allow me to make it a little bit easier for you - Tony... I want you to fire me. Tony... DON'T COUNT ME DOWN, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! SHUT YOUR MOUTH! Look at me, Tony... Look at me. I want you to fire me, YOU FUCKING MARK, FIRE ME! FIRE ME! FIRE ME! -

[At this point all of MJF's following words are bleeped. When the bleeping stops, Max tries to continue his promo, but his microphone gets cut off. Furious MJF throws the mic on the mat.]
- Thanks to CAGEMATCH inmates KuczyPL and Hangerman for sending in transcripts. Keep it going!
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Average rating: 9.89  [190]
Average rating in 2022: 9.89  [190]
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