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"You both can go smurf yourselves"
Abraham Washington: "[beginnt die Abraham Washington Show, indem er sich bei den buhenden Zuschauern mehrmals aufgesetzt bedankt] Now, at this time I would like to go ahead and welcome all of you out to the Abraham Washington Show and I am of course your host: [zeigt auf den Titantron über ihm, auf dem groß das Wort "APPLAUSE" zu sehen ist, was noch mehr Buhrufe auslöst] Abraham Washington. Thank you, thank you, thank you very much. Now, at this time I just wanna let you all now how happy and excited I was, when I found out that we were coming to New York, baby. [Jubel] Yeah! Yes Sir, New York! But yet, I also wanna let you know how sad and disappointed I was, when I found out that we were coming to Long Island. [Buhrufe] Yeah, thats right! I heard stories about you all, whatever you do, don't rob me, okay? I ain't got no money, I had to spent it all on extra security coming here, alright? No, I'm just playing, I'm just joking. Now unlike certain other Late Night TV talk show hosts here in New York, no names mentioned, *cough-David Letterman-cough*, excuse me. I wanna to send a special invitation to former Alaskan governor Sarah Palin, I wanna to let you know you are more than welcome on the Abraham Washington show. Please feel free to come sit on my lap, I mean, I'm sorry, my couch, anytime you like, okay? 'Cause I know you ain't doing nothing. You ain't got no job. Please feel free Sarah...
[Zack Ryders Musik unterbricht Washington. Ryder begrüßt den Host der Show und setzt sich dann mit den Füßen auf den Tisch auf die Couch]
Excuse me, but what in the hell are you doing, man? Have you lost your mind? What's your name? Jack Ryder? What are you doing on my show?"
Zack Ryder: "Bro, this is Long Island... [Jubel] and everybody knows the only good thing to come out to Long Island is Zack Ryder! [Buhrufe] Oh, you people know it. You guys saved up to buy tickets just to hear me say: Whoo whoo whoo, you know it! But more importantly: My girlfriend is in the house tonight. What's up baby girl? I love you, XOXO!"
Washington: "Man, you must be out of your mind. First of all, you came out here and put your feet on my comfy table and this thing ain't even paid for, you gonna make me loose my Rent-a-Center deposit. Yeah, this stuff if expensive. Originally I was supposed to have Shelton Benjamin scheduled tonight."
Ryder: "Shelton Benjamin? That guy's back again? I'm a better guest times ten than Shelton Benjamin. Look at me, I'm charismatic, I'm athletic, I'm good-looking and I got a killer sense of style [steht auf um seinen Style zu präsentieren]."
Washington: "Killer sense of style? Yeah, killer sense of style, man you look like Grimace dressed in a Heather Mills outfit, dog!"
Ryder: "Who's Heather Mills?"
Washington: "Google it!"
Ryder: "Listen, listen, I can sing, I can dance, I'm very entertaining. I'm the only guest that you need. Shelton Benjamin, he can't even hold a candle to me, bro."
Washington: I might have to agree with you on that one. In fact, I didn't even want Shelton on my show in the first place. The only reason I had him on the show was because General Manager Tiffany made me book him on the show. You know, he's lame enough as it is with that entrance music of his "Ain't no stoppin' me now". Yeah, ain't no stoppin' me from falling asleep and watching his boring behind, you know what I'm saying?"
Ryder: "Tell me about it, I mean, he's a good wrestler – not as good as me – but that's all he's got. He's got the blond hair, he's boring, he's not..."
[Shelton Benjamins Musik ertönt und er stellt sich neben die beiden]
Benjamin: "If I say, what I wanted to say: This being a PG show and all... I'm pretty sure we get throwing off the air. But I have a solution, I have a solution. You see, I'll just talk to you guys in smurf. You know smurf, little blue guys, live in a forest, mushrooms... Speakin' of mushrooms.. [blickt auf Ryder] judging from that outfit, you've had a few. So we got this dumb smurf, sitting out here with this peace of smurf on this smurfed up show talking trash about me. Well, quite frankly you both can go smurf yourselves."
Washington: "Oh yeah? You did come out here on my show and you disrespect me, you fake Dennis Rodman reject? Yeah, that's right, I said it. This ain't the hip-hop Source awards, man, you need to calm down. Do you understand? And you talk about speakin' smurf? Smurf me? Smurf me? I'll like to speak smurf too, because you can kiss my natural black assssss-rael (Anm.: gemeint ist Gargamels Katze Azrael)!"
Benjamin: "Who-who-who-who-who Wannabe-Byron-Allen: Shut the smurf up! And you [zeigt auf Ryder] you said you were giving a shout out to your girlfriend earlier? That's funny because I was giving a shout out to your girlfriend earlier too."
Ryder: "No, no, nobody shouts out on my girlfriend! Nobody does!"
Benjamin: "Actually, everybody gives a shout out to your girlfriend."
Washington: "And if that's the case then, can a brother get a shout out wherever you are?"
Ryder: "Shut up, shut up, shut up! What is your deal bro? Are you mad because I'm way more entertaining than you?"
Benjamin: "Yeah, that hair proves it."
Ryder: "So what do you wanna do? You wanna prove if I'm more entertaining than you? What do you want, what is it?"
Benjamin: "Anytime you wanna test that theory... be my guest."
Ryder: "Do you want me to put you to shame? I'll do it right now, I don't care, let's do it!"
Washington: "Alright, hold on, hold on guys. You know what, I got a better idea. Since this is the Abraham Washington show and both of you feel that you are the most entertaining here in ECW, I got something. Step around here, young men, step around here. We're gonna do this first time ever on ECW. We're about to have ourselves - forget American Idol - we're about to have ourselves Abraham Idol. Yeah, where we get to see, who is the most entertaining Superstar. Now, Zack Ryder, since this is my show I'm gonna give you the opportunity to pick a song of your choice, that you would like to sing and Shelton Benjamin will have to sing the same song, so what song do you have in mind?"
Benjamin: "How fair is that?"
Ryder: "Thank you, thank you 'bro. Well, my girlfriend is here, so let me dedicate this one out to her. Little, "Only wanna be with you" by Hootie & the Blowfish. You guys know that, right?"
[Zack Ryder trinkt noch einen Schluck Wasser und beginnt dann zu singen, vergisst aber den Text]
Washington: "You forget the words of the song? How could you pick a song you don't know the words to, man? That wasn't smart now, was it? Damn, that was dumb. Forgetting words, that was dumb. Well, Shelton? Do you think you can follow that?"
Benjamin: "Okay, but I didn't pick the song."
Während Shelton singt, geht Ryder von hinten auf ihn los]
Ryder: "Now you're singing the blues: Whoo whoo whoo!"
[Benjamin kann zurückschlagen und Ryder zum Rückzug bringen]
- XOXO: Internetsprache für Umarmungen und Küsse
- Grimace ist ein lila Wesen aus dem McDonalds-Universum, die Erwähnung spielt auf die Hauptfarbe von Ryders Outfit an, Heather Mills ist Paul McCartneys beinamputierte Ex-Ehefrau, ihre Erwähnung ist eine Spitze gegen Ryders Hose, die auf einer Seite lang und auf der anderen ultrakurz ist
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6.43Current Total Rating
Number of comments: 7
Average Rating: 6.92
Average in 2012: 6.00
Average in 2011: 8.00
Average in 2009: 6.91
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