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"The Scorpion King got a tiny ding-a-ling"

Promo

Promo Data
Title:
"The Scorpion King got a tiny ding-a-ling"
Date:
03.03.2003
Jonathan Coachman: [klopft an Rocks Umkleide, der ihm öffnet] "Hey Rock, what's going on with..."
The Rock: "Are you... are you on crack, Coach? Are you on cr... Wh-what are you doing? What are you doing?

Jonathan Coachman: "Well I just wanne get a word with you before you go out tonight an..."
The Rock: "You can't get a word with The Rock, that's not how it works, you know that. You just don't knock on The Rock's locker room like that... the people's locker... you know that! You already know that! Let The Rock... hey-hey do you have an appointment to speak to The Rock, is that it?"

Jonathan Coachman: "Ro-rock, we go back, I don't need an appoint..."
The Rock: "Gock-gock-gock-a-gock! Shut up, Coach! Let The Rock take the people's palm pilot, ca-cow! [blickt auf einen imaginären Organizer in seiner Hand] How's Wednesday?"

Jonathan Coachman: "You know Wednesday doesn't work for me."
The Rock: "Wednesday works! You and your Rock-wannabe-haircut get outta The Rock's face. Who cuts your hair? Ray Charles? Beat it! Watch your ass!"

[Coach geht und die Kamera folgt The Rock in dessen Umkleide]

The Rock: "Rock can't be dealin' with that! The Rock's got millions and millions of fans waiting for him. [Buhrufe] The Rock says, millions and millions of Rock's fans waiting for him. [lautere Buhrufe] Where's The Rock's guitar? The Rock has gotta soothe his soul, The Rock has gotta sing a sooong! The Rock has gotta sing a sooong, baby! [The Rock öffnet einen Vorhang in seiner Umkleide und findet dahinter Hurricane vor, der ihn ernst anstiert] Ha, excuse The Rock one second! [The Rock zieht den Vorhang zu, wendet sich ab und will sich offenbar einreden, das gerade nicht gesehen zu haben. Er zieht dann den Vorhang wieder vor und Hurricane springt ihm entgegen]"

The Hurricane: "Holy hypocrite! Just last week, you challenged Stone Cold Steve Austin to meet you face to face. And yet this week, you got Eric Bischoff and his criminal commune doing all your dastardly work. WHASUPWITDAT?"

The Rock: "Um... how long have you been sitting in there? Huh? Watching The Rock in that locker walkin' around here naked?... Na-nah, don't answer that! Itell you what: The Rock's glad you're here. The Rock's glad you're because you see I want to talk to you. The Rock... he was gonna go looking for you. You remember last week when you came waltzin' into The Rock's locker? Remember that? Ha-ha, and you talked about how The Hurricane could just whip The Scorpion King's ass? Yeah, you remember that? And he also talked about how The Hurricane could just gonna toss The Rock over the top rope. Remember that?

Well if The Rock's memory serves him correctly, it was The Rock that tossed your little Hamburglar monkey-ass right over the top rope! Remember that? Before all your friends: Grimace and Mary McCheese, Ronald McDonald, all them. Remember that? More importantly than that, more importantly than that: When The Rock tossed you over the top rope, he was screaming something. The Rock was screaming something very important in your ear. Do you remember what The Rock was screaming?"

The Hurricane: "I remember you screaming. But it was when Booker T tossed your ass over the top rope when you were screaming. Like this. [Demonstiert mehrmals, wie Booker ihn über das Seil warf]

The Rock: "Don't do that! Na-na-na, none of that! HEY! He-ey [an die Fans gerichtet] stop cheering! [Jubel] Hey, he didn't throw, no he didn't. You hear The Rock, he didn't throw! No Booker T didn't throw The Rock, he... tripped over the top rope, that's what happened. YEAH, THAT'S WHAT HAPPENED! [Buhrufe] Oh, The Rock said, that's what happened! [Lautere Buhrufe]

L-l-let The Rock remind you of somethin'! Let The Rock remind you of somethin': You ain't nothin'! You ain't nothin'! You ain't no super hero! You're not like The Scorpion King. You're 100 pounds of nothin'. Five feet nothin'! Oho, excuse The Rock one second, excuse The Rock, his cellphone's going on! [Holt sein Handy aus der Tasche] Oh yeah, ca-cow! Hello? Hey it's nothin', he says he knows you! You're nothin'! [Ans Publikum] Hey, don't laugh at The Rock's jokes! You're nothin'! And... as a super hero... [lacht]... you got braces! You got braces! Wh-what, you're the president of the student's council? Is that what you gotta do? You gotta go sell band candy after the show? [lacht] Get your little Hamburglar green monkey-ass out...

But, before you leave... before you leave, before you go fly out, you know all that unrealistic crap... let The Rock remind you of somethin': The Rock, when he threw you over the top rope, he was saying, he was screaming to you, he said - hey, the greatest line a super hero has ever said. The Scorpion King, he said: ‘Haku machente, dah! Haku machente, ah!' Do you remember that? Do you have any idea what that means? Do you have any idea how enormous that is? Do you know what Haku machente means?"

The Hurricane: "Well apparently, from what I saw behind that curtain, it means The Scorpion King got a tiny ding-a-ling!"

The Rock: "WHAT? WHAT? NO! NO! WHAT? Hey hey who-who-who: I mean, there's a reason why they call The Rock The Rock, oh yeah! Ea-eeeeeasy big fellow! [Tut so als müsste er sein Ding in Zaum halten] Oh yeah. Ah no! That... [Zum Publikum] Stop laughing! Yo know I tell you... how about back to reality, a place where you clearly have no idea where that's at. Cause you're clearly insane! The Rock asks you this: What so you want? What do you want?"

The Hurricane: "I'm here, Rock, beacause I figured you out. You're a coward. You're afraid of Steve Austin. You're afraid of Stone Cold. That's why you got Eric Bischoff to do all your dirty work today. You see, you talk a big game and your guns, they do flap! But it would appear that you're full of brahma bull-CRAP! [Posiert und verschwindet]

The Rock: [Schreit ihm mit etwas Verzögerung nach] "Hey there, The Rock ain't scared of nobody! Nobody! [Spricht mit seinem Ding] You are still the man!"
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